The last few nights I started noticing a moldy smell in the bedroom and I thought it was from the apple core my son had left out. I threw it away but the smell only got stronger. Tonight I found this. He’s been taking apples up with him every night, eating half of one, then stashing it behind a dresser. There were also half-eaten bananas and it looked like he’d been doing this for a good while because there was about five pounds of very expensive fruit rotting and oozing. 
If you ever get the urge to have children, come back and look at this.

The last few nights I started noticing a moldy smell in the bedroom and I thought it was from the apple core my son had left out. I threw it away but the smell only got stronger. Tonight I found this. He’s been taking apples up with him every night, eating half of one, then stashing it behind a dresser. There were also half-eaten bananas and it looked like he’d been doing this for a good while because there was about five pounds of very expensive fruit rotting and oozing. 

If you ever get the urge to have children, come back and look at this.

sneakydeaky:

Ok, “funny” story. I once saw a pigeon die in this exact way. It was such a weird time in my life too. I was eight months pregnant, in a strange town, completely alone because my husband was on tour in China or some shit, and I was walking to the market and feeling quite bad for my poor self when I approached a street. There was this old, tattered pigeon with white eyes on the corner of the street, feebly pecking at something, when a van comes barreling around the corner (Russian drivers always barrel). The pigeon didn’t even flinch when the front wheels missed him by inches. A split second later the back wheel rolled right over him. Just squashed him. One second he was there, pecking at the ground, the next he was just a flat pigeon pancake. The strangest thing was the sound it made - like a balloon popping. Just “pop” and a small squirt of guts and no more pigeon.
I watched the whole thing happen from a few feet away and it was over very quickly, but I think I just stood there and looked at the poor bird for half a minute. Insane giggling rose within me. This was one of the most absurd things I’d ever seen! Somehow it made my depressing and unusual life more bearable and I walked on feeling a little lighter. 
When I think back on that, I like to imagine the pigeon committed suicide. It was obviously old and/or ill, and winter was coming, so maybe it just didn’t want to spend another six months freezing his little butt off. Rest in peace, pigeon.

sneakydeaky:

Ok, “funny” story. I once saw a pigeon die in this exact way. It was such a weird time in my life too. I was eight months pregnant, in a strange town, completely alone because my husband was on tour in China or some shit, and I was walking to the market and feeling quite bad for my poor self when I approached a street. There was this old, tattered pigeon with white eyes on the corner of the street, feebly pecking at something, when a van comes barreling around the corner (Russian drivers always barrel). The pigeon didn’t even flinch when the front wheels missed him by inches. A split second later the back wheel rolled right over him. Just squashed him. One second he was there, pecking at the ground, the next he was just a flat pigeon pancake. The strangest thing was the sound it made - like a balloon popping. Just “pop” and a small squirt of guts and no more pigeon.

I watched the whole thing happen from a few feet away and it was over very quickly, but I think I just stood there and looked at the poor bird for half a minute. Insane giggling rose within me. This was one of the most absurd things I’d ever seen! Somehow it made my depressing and unusual life more bearable and I walked on feeling a little lighter. 

When I think back on that, I like to imagine the pigeon committed suicide. It was obviously old and/or ill, and winter was coming, so maybe it just didn’t want to spend another six months freezing his little butt off. Rest in peace, pigeon.

My son’s list of reason why I should let him play games online:

  • I’m a boy!
  • I’m shiny!
  • I’m a little kid!
  • I NEED IT!
Baby coonsters! One of the raccoons we feed got nicknamed ‘Glutton’ for her insatiable hunger - here’s the reason. She’s brought them by a few times now and they are just too cute for words.

Baby coonsters! One of the raccoons we feed got nicknamed ‘Glutton’ for her insatiable hunger - here’s the reason. She’s brought them by a few times now and they are just too cute for words.

Probably my favorite costume they ever had :D.

Probably my favorite costume they ever had :D.

Circus boy, bored of the circus.

Circus boy, bored of the circus.

Icons in my 100 year old great grandmother’s bedroom.

Icons in my 100 year old great grandmother’s bedroom.

My son’s schedule: 2am-2pm. Yeah. I’m gonna get a horrible mother award any day here. If I wake him up any earlier, he still stays up that late so why bother? *sigh* At least he’s self-entertaining - it’s 12:30am and he’s quite content doing a puzzle.

Clowns in Moscow’s “Bolshoy” Circus

Clowns in Moscow’s “Bolshoy” Circus

I GOT THE JOB. FUCK YES. I just have to pee in a cup tomorrow and I’ll be gainfully employed again, just in time for me to go get my kid back.

I GOT THE JOB. FUCK YES. I just have to pee in a cup tomorrow and I’ll be gainfully employed again, just in time for me to go get my kid back.

Guess who’s got a job interview on Monday? Pretty sure I’m gonna nail it too!

Guess who’s got a job interview on Monday? Pretty sure I’m gonna nail it too!

View out back at our house in the village in rural Bashkiria.

View out back at our house in the village in rural Bashkiria.

Wasn’t he cute :).

Wasn’t he cute :).

I miss my dog :(. I don’t even know when I’ll be able to get another one.

I miss my dog :(. I don’t even know when I’ll be able to get another one.